There is a manipulation technique called: the initial decision trap. It is used by salespeople, as well as managers or, obviously, plain manipulators. The method is simple: it aims to make you commit to an action. Psychologically, once we’ve made a commitment to something, we find it hard to go back and “break our promise”. The initial decision trap however aims to make you commit without having all the info. That is why it’s a manipulation technique.

Relying on a psychological fact, we sometimes set this trap ourselves, involuntarily. The enhancers are verbal commitment and physical presence. When one says “Yes, I will…” in person, in front of other people, that person will find it twice as hard to change the decision. Why? We could dig into that, but it doesn’t serve any purpose. It has to do with our credibility, socially accepted behaviour and other stuff.

For the above stated reason, an online commitment such as ticking a box does not have the same effect. People familiar with this technique will try to make you verbally say that you will take an action. They need your commitment for the trap to work.

Getting out of the trap

First, understand how it works. It’s a psychological blockage based on how our mind operates. However, we also need justification for every action we take. Even if the justification is childish – for example: “because I wanted so” – it’ still there.

Second, once the context has changed you are justified to alter your decisions. We react easier when the cost of our initial commitment is substantial vs when it’s a small cost. That is because a substantial cost may threaten other basic needs we have. For example, a commitment to spending a substantial amount of money may affect your possibilities to supply a proper standard of living.

To get someone deeper in the mud, you take that person a step further. Example: you have made a verbal commitment, now let’s also take a first action. We set an appointment, we ask you to take a first lesson and so on. It will feel more difficult to give up.

Third: your time is limited. Be careful how you spend it. There are ways to buy time, but only limited quantities.

Real life examples

You sign up for a course. You’ve seen the agenda, it looks good. The course spreads over 8 months. Let’s assume you are mature enough and being allowed to pay in instalments you were not in a hurry to pay in advance. During the course, after 4 months, you realize that it doesn’t serve your interest anymore or that the content is low quality. What do you do?

Many people will find it hard to quit, because they’ve “went so far already”. If you’ve read the article on going on a wrong direction, you might act differently. No matter how many steps you’ve taken on a wrong path, it’s still better to go back than continuing on the same wrong path.

A second example. You book an apartment you intend to buy for a small reservation fee. In the mean time, you find out that the real estate developer is known for its low quality constructions or has some legal issues. Do you still stick to your initial commitment? If you are really, really  weak, you might. Most people, because of the high stakes involved, will probably cancel their initial booking, accepting to lose that small fee, rather then make a commitment to pay a sum potentially 100x bigger.

Third example. “I need you to promise me that you will stay on board, no matter how difficult things will be”. Commitment. How far would you take it? Would you stay on the deck of a sinking ship, to uphold your moral values? If you suffer from an obsessive-compulsive personality disorder, most likely you will. People with OCD are very strict with what they consider moral value, principle or law. Following a leader with OCD can be suicidal because that person will not react to context changes.

Conclusion

Reacting to change, adapting to a new reality, is not a change of mind. It takes a lot of character and confidence, to act on the impact a context has on you, personally, and on your limited time. Not on others, not on their opinions. People who thrive don’t follow wrong paths blindly (not even career paths). They react, recalibrate and adapt. “Because that’s what heroes do”