The impostor syndrome is a state of mind, a perception, in which you attribute success to luck or opportunity. All your work that went behind the success is dismissed in this perception. You fear that at some point your cover will be blown and people will see you as a fraud, a fake. It’s quite common. Most people that take a big step in their career or have a major achievement experience the impostor syndrome.
I want to underline that it’s just a perception. It’s not real. For some people this pressure is too much and they collapse – they give up on their new professional role for example. Impostor syndrome naturally fades with time as you discover that you actually manage your role and are able to do it. Yet, the length of this period may vary and it’s unpleasant.
Why does it happen?
One reason is performance anxiety. If you suffer from the impostor syndrome you already have an image about how things should look like. That role you’ve just got, has a certain depiction in your mind and it’s not matching you. It’s not a 100% match. It’s not perfect.
A second reason can be lowered self confidence. You lack confidence you can perform your role and only luck has brought you where you are. I hope you realize that’s not true.
Lack of confirmation makes you wobbly. You’re doing your tasks or what you think you should be doing, but if nobody supports you and encourages you it may take weeks, months or years to become confident in what you can do.
If only we would learn from other people’s experience… Ask anyone who is successful now or doing your role for years, how were they feeling in the first month? Anyone who is open, honest and not trying to impress, will tell you they were disoriented too. Whenever I took on a job role for the very first time, I had no idea what I was doing. I’m telling that to anyone who is experiencing the impostor syndrome because I’ve felt it too.
What can you do?
While we are unique as individuals, the feelings we experience are not unique. Countless other people have felt the exact same way at some point in their life. The triggers don’t have to be identical. Talk to other people that have been in your position and you will see you’re not the only one who felt like an impostor.
Impostor syndrome comes in with a lot of anxiety. Therefore, you may manifest besides this perception also things like insomnia, digestive problems or neglecting your meals, bad posture and many others. Observe your body and behaviour. Note down the facts, then do the opposite wherever possible. Correct your posture, lift your forehead, smile, go to bed early, take your regular meals. By changing our external surroundings, we can change how we feel on the inside.
You can try to record your voice stating how you feel. Then play it back and analyse each sentence. Does it sound harsh? Is your speech rational (fact based)? Is it a form of self-sabotage (trying to send you back to your initial state, because you are not fit for where you are now)? Does it help you procrastinate (I’m not going to start learning what I have to do because I don’t belong here anyway)?
Oxytocin
A good antidote is oxytocin, the so called ‘love hormone’. That’s because it produces a feeling of safety and attachment, which you lack when experiencing the impostor syndrome. If you’re missing a significant other, you can still get oxytocin through hugs, petting, tender words (either said or heard). Hugging a dog, petting a cat, making a compliment, having sex – they all produce oxytocin. Another positive side effect of oxytocin is that it blocks cortisol (the stress hormone).
Conclusion
The impostor syndrome can hold you back from performing, so you need to get rid of it. Find someone who’s been in your shoes and hear their experience. Observe your body and change what you have to change. Record yourself and analyse your thinking. Increase your oxytocin (you should be doing that anyway).
I believe in you. You’ve got this!
